it's hard to take your own advice

Do you ever listen to yourself doling out healthy, worthwhile advice, all the while knowing full well that you're right at that minute not taking that very advice to heart?  What a shitty feeling.  It's one thing to believe something and another to actually internalize it.

Today, I was giving out advice to my last divorce client on how to let go.  With certain clients over the years-those I knew would be open to it and I thought could benefit from it-I've done what I've dubbed "The Divorce Ceremony."  It involves burning some things and saying goodbye, not so much to your ex-spouse, but more to the person you were when you allowed yourself to be treated poorly or were afraid to be alone or begged...all that stuff that's just not pretty...blessing it all and telling it why you're not that person anymore.  It involves keeping other things that symbolize how you've grown and who you want to be.

Today, with that last client, an amazing woman who I admire and am grateful to have crossed paths with, I allowed myself to share that vibe with her and say goodbye to some of my own demons, admit that I was still sad about some things but that I was also proud of myself for others and grateful for the woman I've become since my divorce.  The sense of relief I felt in allowing myself to talk with her and share some of what I was giving to her with myself was huge.

I'm grateful to her for being herself-someone kind and open enough that I was able to do that-so much stronger and with such a hard won belief in herself that I was able to end my career as a divorce attorney with a client I truly felt I had helped along her journey over the last year.